Steven and the Unique Horn
words: Ruben Maalman - pictures: Ewout van Lambalgen
scroll down here. there's a unicorn!
There once was a boy from Mountieland
(A far away place where the mountains are grand)
His name was Steven, and he discovered ages ago
that unicorns happen to live on the rainbow
His dad was a quiet man, but not in this case
Sometimes he turned red, and then blue in the face
Time after time he’d express his sorrow
‘Unicorns aren’t real, son! Not today, not tomorrow!’
Well, time flies (just like unicorns do)
His friends stopped believing, but Steven still knew
That unicorns are not made of fantasy
They’re real! And that’s why his friends would be
laughing and making fun of him all day
They’d glue lunch on his hat, and then they’d say
‘Look, everyone! They exist after all!’
Yes, they were genuinely having a ball
Poor Steven, he would always encounter
laughter, but: ‘Just wait, ‘till I’ve finally found her
(or him), then they will smell some unicorn-dung!’
He doddered into the woods while he clicked with his tongue
But then, all of a sudden and very abruptly
something fell out of the sky, right on Steven’s left knee
Not a leaf, not a berry, it was a sparkling white light
Steven said ‘Very funny guys, ha-ha and good night!’
But what he witnessed had nothing to do with cheap tricks
(This is where the plot twist gets thrown in the mix)
There on that branch stood a unicorn, clear as day
The real deal - just missing one thing, I daresay
‘How do you do, sir?’ the unicorn spoke,
‘I’m in a position here: my unique horn broke!
I tripped on the rainbow and fell all the way down
and it just came off. I’m like a red-nose-less clown!’
Steven, being the hero of this book
Assisted his new friend, and he helped him look
They searched in all places: in trees, in a puddle
They even looked under the unicorn’s wattle
Steven was happy, he had a real friend at last!
Who also believed in unicorns, that was the best!
Unfortunately, the horn was nowhere to be found
‘We’ll improvise one instead! How does that sound?’
‘Something oblong, we’ll tie it together, that’s nice!
Now to find something that goes good with your eyes...’
And so, for our friends a new search came to pass
Unicorn tried a pool cue, a half-empty glass
A small rocket, a funnel, and also a trumpet
A Clothespin, a pencil, even a clarinet
An ice cream, a flower, a bottle of freshly pressed juice
A shell, a sword, dad’s paper with yesterday's news
A feather, a drain cleaner, and... come on, let's see
They needed something corny... maybe a Christmas tree?
Alas, to unicorn these things all did not feel right
But if they just kept looking, Steven thought one of them might?
‘I'm sorry, Steven, I know you do mean well
But I need my own, my unique horn, not the clapper of a bell!’
Steven thought and he thought, his morale was low
Then he looked straight at the answer: that colorful rainbow!
Filled with joy he jumped on unicorn’s back
‘Follow those colors and we'll be right on track!’
They followed the bow and when they reached the end
Steven ran to the pot and he started to rant
‘I believed in your magic as long as I’m alive
Now please, grow no-horn a tusk sharp as a knife!’
And in a bright flash unicorn got back his sheen
He carried the prettiest horn you have ever seen!
But poor Steven should’ve kept his feelings at bay:
for unicorns, the rainbow is like some magnetic highway!
In a moments pass Stevens dear friend was just a tiny dot
‘Now no one will believe me!’ Steven peevishly thought
Down-hearted, heavy-laden, he returned to his old friends
He could see them standing there already, next to the fence
They were all riding unicorns - fake ones, no doubt
‘Not in the mood for teasing, guys!’ Now Steven’s voice was loud.
‘This is no joke, dear Steven! We believe you, yeah, we do!
Our horses were suddenly unicorns! Man, have we smelled their poo!
We’ll have loads of fun - along with you, of course!
(But nobody noticed Bill saying: ‘Has anybody seen my horse?’)